Creativity | Personal
Creativity it’s hard for me. I tend to live in a world of black and whites and really hate any shades of gray in my life, and creativity seems like one big shade of grey. There is no for sure way to capture it, there is no 100% way to inspire it. There is no black and white with creativity. Sure I get inspired but then to try to take that and make it my own? That can be tricky. And yet as a photographer that is what expected of you, to be creative! And I really hate giving the same thing to clients, like a cookie cutter. I want to give each client something creative for every session – probably unrealistic but that is what I want to do. So this photo session was born. I was able to hire a couple of models from Edge Models here in town. Which was nerve wrecking all in it’s own because I haven’t worked with models all on my own before. I found some outfits at Crocus and Ivy, rented a studio space, found hair and make up and it started.
The other part was I was longing to get some photos that I could see in my mind out into an actual photo. I had started photography as therapy. It didn’t start out that way. I was going through a rough break up, life falling apart and i was introduced to a camera. I noticed that after I took a photo that was able to capture what I was feeling inside I felt better. Felt some of that life falling apartness just disappear and it was like AH HA moments. Most of it all it was just relief that what I couldn’t even identify in words – could somehow get out and once it was out – it left my mind and I just felt better. Kinda of like taking out the garbage. And a lot has been building up in my mind, landscape wasn’t cutting it, have been very unlucky in the thunderstorm department this year, so it was time to create that abstracty stuff floating around in my head and get it out.
It was also a chance to play with lights. Being almost strictly an on location photographer without an assistant, I don’t often to get to play with off camera lighting. Without being able to drive, and no assistant, it’s just too much stuff to lug around, and the wind outside can play havoc with the light stands (blowing them over and such). I was schooled in off camera lighting by Zack Arias. It was his one light workshop. That was a deal changer. Best workshop ever. Hands down. If you are a new photographer who doesn’t know how to work with off camera lighting – I highly suggest this workshop. (and he has this cool Q&A thing up and running over here – Q&A blog). And if you are one of those photographers that think I only use natural light and look down on off camera lighting – well I think that’s foolish. Light is light and learning to use it no matter in what form it comes from (from the sun or from a flash) is a very handy skill, especially for weddings where you get little choice in choosing your light or location. I degress…. my other thought was just like nursing though, you don’t use it, you lose it. And I didn’t want to lose this knowledge, so every now and then I break out the lights and practice. Usually on flowers or other still life, this time I wanted people. Real live people. Because lighting people is different then lighting still life.
So I played. I had two lovely models that put up with my abstracty vision of I think my words were calm, serious, soft. I played with the natural light from the sun and the natural light coming from hot shoe and ice light (oh how I adore the ice light, as a wedding photographer that has to be one of the best purchases for light I can recommend). It gave me a chance to try some poses, try some different lighting, to not feel rushed. While I still wanted to give the models some lovely photos, it was also less pressured because no one was expecting anything of me, I just had my own expectations (which were few).
I have no plans to go into fashion photography, nor was I attempting to copy it. This was just plain and simply a chance to get some of those photos out of my head – out. To put these photos out in the world was really difficult for me because I think there is quite a bit of my soul in them. I feel protective over them. Oh sure there are some things photographically I should have paid more attention to (me and straight lines – not sure why I can not seem to hold my camera straight…….) but when I look at many of these photos, I feel that ah ha moment. That mind clearing moment where some of that stuff rolling around in my head is out. And what a relief that is. I am releasing them out to the world though because I believe the models deserve to have their photos out there, they worked hard for me and I want to show that I am happy with the results.
So there you go a little personal piece of what makes me me.
- Edge Models: Brianne and Bridie
- Make Up: Jenna Lynn – Blush Beauty Bar
- Hair: Lesley – Urban Hair